Vulcan Hello, Irish Goodbye

This week has been a week of learning new ways of saying 'hello' and 'goodbye'...

It started last weekend with a binge watching session to catch up with the latest Star Trek series, Discovery, which is now available to watch on Netflix in the UK. And, I have found it to be pretty good so far! Well worth a watch, and definitely full of nice little plot points and pieces of character development to please a long time Trek fan such as myself. And it has also introduced me to the concept of the Vulcan Hello.... (the title of the first episode) ... I won't give any surprises away - however, I'm sure that the reasoning behind such a greeting is logical... or will be by the end of the series ...

And later on that week, thanks to a podcast, I have been taught a whole new way to say goodbye. Ever think of what is worse than going to a party that you didn't really want to be at? It is trying to find the right time to get up and leave that party... remembering to politely say your goodbyes. I think we've all been there. Ugh

I was intrigued this week to hear about something called the Irish Goodbye... referring to leaving a social gathering without saying your farewells. Just slipping out the back way, as you won't be noticed in the crowd... Apparently, the phrase stems from the Irish predilection for extreme hospitality (oh go on, go on, go on... Father Ted reference) and the resultant, tremendous difficulty in getting away from an Irish get-togethers. It's far, far easier to slip away unnoticed...

Yes, I know what you're thinking. How rude to leave without saying goodbye! And there's the problem. Many of us are far too polite to simply walk out without saying thank you. Even if you said thank you when accepting the invite, and once again, when coming in the door in the first place, you have to say it again on the way out... Probably why an Irish Goodbye is so frowned upon. And yet, the practice is now so popular, there's even a term for it. And it's not as if you didn't bother turning up at all, is it...

If you are a slave to etiquette, you simply have to say something. The Emily Post Institute (which advises readers of its website about the correct way to do things) advises that party guests should... "make sure to say goodbye and thank you to each of your hosts... If they're not by the door, seek them out and thank them personally before you go."

I wonder if I could get away with an Irish Goodbye more often...

Poker Face

I'm pretty good at adopting a 'poker face'. Yeah, just like you're supposed to use in the card game, but in my case is not for financial gain, or even to help with your love life (like Lady Gaga). No, this is a self-preservation trait that I found myself using quite a lot...

Because sometimes I simply can't show what I'm thinking when other people are around. It simply wouldn't be polite, for starters. Speaking my mind would get me into far more trouble that I'd like. So I clam up.

But I know I have a problem with this.

Because I really struggle with letting it out later and dealing with it. Keeping it locked up within is simply bad for my health.

Take the other week. I was so angry about something that had happened, that it got to the stage that I simply could not think straight. It took all the strength and determination I had to sit there and endure, repressing my negative feelings because it wasn't an appropriate moment to share them. It wouldn't have been the right time.

So I had to 'suck it up'. Bury it. Put on the mask. Wear that poker face...

But was it easy to try and get it out of my system once everyone had disappeared? Nope.

And I know I have to rid myself of the bitterness... it can't sit there, unresolved. It took about an hour or two of intense examination and deliberate refocussing of my feelings in order to get back on an even keel.

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Father, I acknowledge that I've held resentment and bitterness against the person who made me feel that way. I confess this as sin and ask you to forgive me. I forgive (the person). Remind me, Lord, to not hold any more resentments, but rather to love this person. Father, I ask you to also forgive them.

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. In Jesus' name, Amen.